The "Phenomenon" of Tipping

BBC has a pretty interesting article written by a British journalist about the U.S. custom of tipping for services.

Now, from personal experience, I can tell you foreigners definitely seem confused by the whole "what to tip" question. But that doesn't mean I'll give them any worse service. I may try to trade a table or two, but I'd do that with some of you Yanks too. Call it ageist, call it sexist, whatever you'd like. But when a server sees a table of four women over 80 sitting in their section, he's running for the hills. You may be the sweetest woman in the world, but your $3 tip on a $75 bill for a two hour meal is not enough to convince me that I want to take great care of you.

But I digress. Read this article. The author writes,

"Americans think it is the most natural thing in the world to pay for a service, at the point where you receive it, person-to-person. First, they reason, it keeps whoever is doing the serving on their toes."

He continues,

"A young man in Jackson, Mississippi, once recognised my accent: "Like the Beatles, right?" he said and asked nervously if I knew about "the tipping thing".

I confirmed that rumours of it had reached our side of the Atlantic, but had been received with widespread disbelief."

Now, to his credit, the author does point out that this whole thing is probably based on the fact that Americans are paid far less in service industry jobs, and therefore live on tips. This is true. In California, a server gets paid minimum wage- $8.00/hour. However, an ex-New Yorker tells me he earned somewhere around $2.50/hour in his brief restaurant gig. And according to the U.S. Department of Labor, any employee who is tipped more than $30 in a shift, needs only to be paid $2.13/hour by their employer.

Read that again. Two dollars and thirteen cents. Now, from what I understand (and readers, correct me if I'm wrong), an employee in Britain is paid the Living Wage of 5.53/hour (pounds of course). That's not a lot- it's around $7.70/hour. But it's a definite improvement over $2.13.

The point here is, tipping at a sit-down restaurant IS customary in the U.S., and should be expected when traveling to this country. In Hawaii, it's customary to take your shoes off before entering a home. I can follow that. In Europe there's a lot of air-kissing, whether on two cheeks or one. I can handle that one too. In some parts of Asia, it's customary to present any host with a small gift. So what's wrong with following this tradition as well?

The point of going to a restaurant is to receive service. You eat out so that you don't have to refill your own beverage eight times, retrieve your own ketchup, then ranch dressing, then more bread, then extra napkins, then clean up after yourself. If you are frequenting an establishment specifically for the purpose of getting served, then tip your server.
They work hard, running circles around you to fulfill your every need. They often have kids and families to feed, just like you. They may be from another country, trying to fulfill a dream. They may be a college student trying to pay the way through school.

It's my personal belief that if everyone had to work as a server for just one day, there would never be a bad tip left again. One comment on the BBC article was from a woman who wrote about a restaurant where "the food was so bad, I couldn't leave a tip."

So, what does that have to do with your service? Feel free to complain about your food. You'll probably get it taken off the bill, or at least discounted. But in that case, your tip should only be bigger. Your server is not your cook. He didn't come up with the recipe. Why is he punished? By the way, in punishing him, you've also punished the bussers, the bartenders, the expediters, and the hostesses, all of whom share in a server's nightly take.

One final thought here. Watch the movie "Waiting." Yes, it's disgusting, but it's actually pretty accurate. Well, not the part about the dandruff on the steak. But really, why do you want to mess with the person who controls your food on the other side of the kitchen door? You don't.

Photo credit: Evoke Photography